Deep State Holdings LLC announces key business updates
War: more profitable than pestilence
This story is the first ever “dividend payout” for Common and Preferred Shareholders. If you’re a Public Shareholder (e.g., free subscriber) you won’t be able to read past the “cutoff point” below unless you upgrade to a paid subscription tier.
As I learned from Mateo Askaripour’s superb novel, Black Buck, either I’m selling you on “yes,” or you’re selling me on “no.”
So what’s it gonna be?
Regardless of what you choose, this Friday I’ll be back to report my findings from two municipal election events here in Chicago, one of which takes place this evening. Should be good times.
See you then.
SIOUX FALLS, VALLETTA, Malta & MOSCOW, Russia — (BUSINESS WIRE) — Deep State Holdings LLC (NYSE:DEEP; HKEX:08666), a multinational conglomerate engaged in the development, manufacturing, and distribution of high-innovation products in fast-growing, globalized markets, is pleased to announce unprecedented operating and financial results, unveil exciting new talent acquisitions, and issue record-breaking financial guidance.
“Following our spectacular performance in 2021 — which included the once-in-a-lifetime launch of our world-class Omicron brand, as well as the continued adoption of our complementary portfolio of mRNA vaccines and booster shots — we knew a strategic pivot would be required to continue delivering profitable, sustainable, organic growth,” said Thomas Jeffrey “Tom” Hanks, Deep State’s Executive Chairman and Chief Executive Officer. “Igniting a third World War was the obvious choice, and thus far we’ve been extremely pleased with the returns we’ve generated for our shareholders.”
William “Bill” Kristol, Executive Vice President of Deep State’s War Division, added: “War is clarifying. War is purifying. War is profitable.”
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